Gabrielle
It was a rough ride there for a while, but we made it. On April 1st Lin woke me up and told me that her stomach hurt and she wanted to go deliver the baby. We rushed out of the guest house and I grabbed everything I thought we might need.
“What are you doing?! Hurry up.” Said Lin, “What are you grabbing the bananas for.”
“They’re gonna go bad, we should eat them.” I said.
We got in our truck and drove to the private hospital. They immediately started on bloodwork and cervical checks and everything.
“Be careful with the cervical check.” I said, “Don’t you dare break her water.”
10 minutes later Lin went to the bathroom and her water broke. The doctors started preparing, they asked me to sign a document saying that we’d do a c-section if things didn’t work out.
“Well, let’s wait until that comes, I want to deliver the baby naturally.” I said.
The doctor began giving a spiel about how the baby was too big and they wouldn’t allow us to give birth naturally at the private hospital. They told us the only option is for them to take Lin to the State hospital. I told them that I would rather just take my wife to a different government hospital (Kantha Bopha) then myself. Kantha Bopha is famous for only doing C-sections as an absolute last resort. The private hospital was a little mad, we were mad too. We waited for them to finish their billing so that they’d let us leave to go deliver the baby at the other hospital.
I drove Lin to the hospital and they took her into the delivery room while I waited outside, but after half an hour they called me in to talk to Lin. They never allow the husband into the room while the wife is giving birth, but they let me because they needed me to decide whether we would do a c-section or not. I encouraged Lin to hang in there and that we could do it naturally.
After 2 hours the doctors said that they didn’t think the baby would be able to exit the birth canal because the baby was big and although Lin was fully dilated her pelvis only had opened on one side. I was coaching Lin as she groaned in pain. She pleaded with me to sign the paper so that they’d do the c-section. The doctors told me it was getting close to lunch time so if we were gonna do a c-section we’d have to do it while the doctors were still working.
Lin and I had both decided beforehand that we would do whatever we could to avoid a c-section because the recovery is brutal and long, but now Lin was convinced that she couldn’t go forward. I told her that 3 hours wasn’t that long, but in the end we decided to undergo the operation.
Half an hour later they brought me a large pale baby with an elongated skull from the incomplete birthing process (After a couple days the head returns to normal). They said the baby was 4.1kgs (9 pounds) born at 10:55am on April 1st.
They had me take the baby to the room where they put the babies in observation.
“It’s important to take the baby to her mother as soon as we can.” I said.
“We need to observe the baby here in case there’s a problem, like difficulty breathing or whatnot.” The doctor said.
“What exactly are you looking for?” I asked. The doctor froze and couldn’t find the words to respond. Finally they told me to take my daughter and go to her mother.
Lin was lying in a hospital bed in a room with 8 other mothers and their newborns and their designated support family member. I was Lin’s support family member, the only non-Cambodian in the whole place. Usually non-Cambodians don’t enter this hospital and they have a reputation for not receiving non-Cambodians but I had no such issue. I understand though, the hospital is a modern clean good hospital but it’s still fundamentally Cambodian and many many many people are born their every day. What do I mean by Cambodian? I mean that typically at a free hospital like this one in Cambodia, there are not nurses watching you, bringing food, and helping with everything. It’s the responsibility of the the support family member, me.
So I found myself watching my daughter Gabrielle, watching my wife and doing all the errands myself. I confess it was pretty stressful. Lin couldn’t sit up, she couldn’t breastfeed. I did not want to start Gabrielle on formula because I know how hard it is to break that habit, but after 12 hours I worried that my baby was hungry. Usually the support family member takes shifts with two other people, but I had no one to switch with; Lin’s family was far away and so was mine. Marlin and Sreyown came and helped for a bit. And eventually Lin’s brother came for a few days so that I could get a few hours sleep.
Lin said that the other husbands were kinda lethargic and were tired of helping their wives but when they saw that even I a foreigner was doing it all by myself they started to have strength again.
After 5 days, they finally released us to go home. We were exhausted. There were trials but we saw God have mercy on us, we saw him help us every step of the way and whenever we wanted to be discouraged we looked back to what we’ve come through knowing that he who begin a good work in us would see it to completion.
A month later
Now it’s been a month and we’re at Lin’s family’s house and Lin’s mom and sister-in-law help watch the baby.
Thoughts
Gabrielle is so precious, she loves to be held, she just needs attention and to know that her parents are with her. She loves to sleep while hugging either mom or dad. When I was stressed in the hospital, it was good to know that Jesus loves me like a little child. He knows my needs, he hears my cries and I am his offspring. Jesus has not brought us to where we are just to abandon us now.
It’s so easy to get discouraged by the current circumstance and forget how God pulled us out of the last one that we were sure we wouldn’t get out of.
Development
While waiting for our baby, I’ve had plenty of time to develop PeakSlab (my Khmer language app) into something that is very usable. (There’s Lao and various other languages too, but Khmer is the most mature). I’m also starting a Khmer language learning app as well, but that has quite a lot more to go.
I think that this could be the greatest dictionary platform ever since it doesn’t need to be installed, it works offline and it’s very fast and efficient.
Testimonies
- Grandma Samnang’s daughters have given their lives to Jesus.
- Paeng and Samen (Two of Marlin and Sreyown’s disciples) have been leading their families to Jesus and their Wednesday bible study keeps growing larger.
News
We had 3 more coworkers come to Cambodia! Darien and Lindsey did AMT (Advanced Mission Training) here in Cambodia last year and they chose to join and they’ve gotten funded very quickly. Mia did AMT a couple years ago and she’s finally ready too. They’ve raised up a team of partners and they’re ready to learn the language and help with the ministry.
10 of our Cambodian coministers are also transitioning to also raising their own funds from Cambodians to do full time ministry as well. Even if all the foreigners leave (none of us plan on leaving) there will still be a sustainable movement of God continuing the work and growing without us.
Now that we are officially a local NGO here it is a lot of paperwork and taxes and laws and stuff we have to follow, but we’re learning and getting established. We are going to start building some more structures on the base this year.
Praise
- Gabrielle is a month old!
Pray
- That we would get the baby’s passports done quickly.
- That Lin and Gabrielle can visit the US at the end of this year.
- For the expeditions and AMT and different events that they would glorify God and be fruitful for the kingdom.
Tommy and Lin